I normally keep the cycling talk to race reports and social-commentary only, but at the risk of inviting hate and trolls, I'm crossing the streams this week.
"On your left! On your right!" As Jeff says, this translates to, "Cat 5 Coming Through!"
If you're already there and I'm getting too close, that's one thing, but a hand on my ass is a far better signal. But if you're just trying to move up and shouting it as though you are trying to get to the toilet at midnight during Summerfest after Ted Nugent has just performed and your body is definitely rejecting those cheese-fries?? PLEASE SHUT UP. Also, be more creative, for God's sake. It's a race, and if you can't fit, don't get mad 'cause I'm not moving over for you. I've got one concern and that's the wheel(s) in FRONT of me, not behind.
Which leads me to guys who yell and scream constantly to "look behind you!" Yes, if you're about to jump and start a new line, give a look back and make sure you aren't going to crash the 13 people drafting behind you. But, ultimately you are responsible for the wheel in front of you, so have an out if you are in the middle and wheels are overlapped. Safety is important, yes, especially right of the yellow line, but speaking strictly pack-safety? It's a race, and people are in base-mode. Priority 1 is to accomplish your goal, whatever that it is. It's a risk to even start and they make you sign that waiver for a reason.
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Drivers who do the "annoyed lane-change" or the "annoyed acceleration." Especially around cyclists, delivery trucks, and the like. Vehicles that don't go very fast yet have just as much a right to the road as these people do. A revving engine in a 3,000lb death-machine is such a great outlet for the personal expression of your weak-minded willingness to risk the lives around you to reach the redlight 15 seconds earlier.
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My cat's ass.
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Being Jack Tripper (hang in there...just 'til Sunday).
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