People who are embarrassed to poop when someone else is in the restroom.
If you are afraid of making pooping noises in the stall, and therefore are going to sit in there and not make a sound the entire time anyone else is in the men's room, such as when I spent approximately nine minutes changing into my cycling clothes today ...why do you attempt to poop at work in the first place??
So I'm thinking in a high traffic restroom, you've gotta be in there for, what...three, four hours a day? Waiting for whoever else is in there to just leave already so you can free a hostage before the next person walks in? And then wait another 10 minutes to take care of the fart that didn't make it out? God knows when you'll have time to wipe!
"Ewwwwww, gross!!! Someone is shitting and wiping their shitty ass...in the MEN'S ROOM! Oh, my GAWD somebody call Human Resources!"
Do you have low-pooping self-esteem? Do you think you are the grossest pooper ever? As if no one else makes disgusting noises when taking a shit? God I hope not, for your sake. And if you are the grossest pooper ever, then...forget I said anything and I thank you for your prudence.
(Do women do this, too?)
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